


Bringing Up Sandor

by Stickthinbarbie



Category: A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Conniving!Sansa, Exasperated!Sandor, F/M, Fluff, Inspired by a Movie, Katherine & Grant Humor, Not supposed to make much sense, Silly
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-24
Updated: 2016-01-02
Packaged: 2018-05-09 00:23:25
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 6
Words: 5,529
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5518517
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Stickthinbarbie/pseuds/Stickthinbarbie
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Sandor stays after the Blackwater. His staying proves his feelings to Sansa & she is on a mission to make him admit those feelings to her. She invents the idea of roping him into a wild goose (or cat) chase in order to exhaust him into admittance.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. He Loves Me, He Loves Me Not

**Author's Note:**

> Based on my watching “Bringing Up Baby” and wanting to bring a little bit of Hepburn & Grant-esque humor to our favorite lovebirds. 
> 
> Sandor stays after the Blackwater. His staying proves his feelings to Sansa & she is on a mission to make him admit those feelings to her. She invents the idea of roping him into a wild goose (or cat) chase in order to exhaust him into admittance. 
> 
> Sansa is aged up to 18  
> Sandor follows the book age/description  
> (though, of course, you can view them in your mind however you please) 
> 
> In this story, Sansa is a bit more knowing about the ways & desires of men, having watched the happenings around her in King’s Landing for years.
> 
> Going to rush quickly through the BBW scene, since we’ve all read it about a million times now. You know how it goes, it’s not the focus of this story. Biggest change here is that he stays. 
> 
> I own nothing. Ownership goes to GRRM & the creators of the movie "Bringing Up Baby."
> 
> [Picset.](http://beautyinthebird.tumblr.com/post/136481753796/finished-fic-bringing-up-sandor-read-on-ao3)

_He stayed._ He stayed. **For me.**

She stood in court the day after the Blackwater burned and watched as punishments and rewards were doled out in turns. As he had entered the grand hall with a large group of soldiers, she saw him immediately and her heart nearly burst out of her chest. The realization dawning on her that he did, in fact, care about her. 

He had come to her in the middle of the night while the Blackwater was lit in a green blaze. It was the fire. The fire had scared him out of battle and he wanted to run, even wanted her to run with him. She might have gone with him too, if he hadn’t been so drunk. She had never seen him that drunk before. When she turned down his offer to leave with him, he held a knife to her throat demanding a song. It was odd - though her body trembled, she knew he wouldn’t hurt her. She sang the first song that came to her mind. The Mother’s Hymn. Then he wept on top of her before getting up and beginning to storm out of her chambers. 

_Wait. Don’t go. Stay. Stay for me, please._ She had begged him. He turned to look at her for a moment, an unknown look in his stormy grey eyes, before tearing off his cloak and walking away. She thought for sure that she would never see him again. 

In such a wreck of emotion, she curled in a ball on the floor, covering herself in the cloak he had left behind in his wake. White, blood stained. Smelling of war and death and something else, something just so _him_. It was then, after he had left and with the thought of never seeing him again, that she realized the depths of her feelings for him. 

Sandor was no knight, of that she was certain, but he had saved her all the same. Many times. And every time she walked the halls of the keep or stood in court, it was those steel grey eyes that she sought out. Though his words were often harsh, he was also gentle and he was the only one who had never hurt her – even on Joffrey’s order, he refused. 

Standing in court that day, she decided she needed to know, needed to hear from him, how much he cared about her. _But how will I get him to do so?_ A million thoughts crossed through her mind when all of a sudden, she heard her name. Calm at first, then repeated with all the contempt her _beloved_ could hold. 

Joffrey’s cruelty was kept in check, thanks to the presence of his grandfather, Tywin, as he informed her that she was no longer his betrothed and that he would instead be betrothed to Margaery Tyrell. It took everything in her to feign devastation at the news.

Her internal elation was halted when a little while later it was Sandor who was called to the front. She found out then that he had returned to battle after disappearing for a short while, spewing some rather treasonous comments upon his initial exit. _I wonder what he could have said. He was certainly angry at that time. Oh dear, they don’t know he came to my chambers, do they?_

_Joffrey wants him punished. I can see it in his eyes._ She wanted to scream out, faint, do anything to create a scene and allow him to run. She was just about to do so when Tywin leaned in to Joffrey’s ear  & she watched the blood leave the horrible king’s face. He was angry, not going to get his way, but he had no choice but to follow his grandfather’s orders. 

“Dog. Though I think you should lose your head for your treasonous words, my grandfather insists that you went above and beyond your duty in battle. That you saved my uncle, the Hand, from being sliced in two.” Joffrey sneered at that. He obviously didn’t care that Sandor saved the imp, but it was celebrated only because of his title. “As well as almost single-handedly keeping Stannis’ troops at bay until my grandfather and the strength of Casterly Rock and Highgarden arrived to finish them. For this, you may keep your head. And your position on the Kingsguard. Now get out of my sight before I change my mind.”

Sansa’s heart, which had completely stopped and fallen to the pit of her stomach upon his name being called, began it’s beating again at this and she knew the gods were on her side today. She would be sure to go to both the sept and godswood to give her thanks to both the old gods and the new, just as soon as she could get away from court. 

\-------

She was in the godswood almost every day since that first day in court after the battle. It was quiet there, no one else cared about the old gods, and she found it the best place to think. 

There was a particular stone bench in the clearing, still canopied under the forest of trees – letting just enough light in to fill the air without causing her to squint at the light at the sun’s height. This was where she came to clear her mind and let her thoughts roam free. 

It had been near a full moon’s turn and she still had no idea what her grand plan to get Sandor to admit his affections would be.

Luckily for her, since Joffrey seemed adamant about not being alone with his dog ever since the battle, Sandor was often assigned to her guard. “A traitorous dog for a traitor’s daughter” seemed to be his favorite chant these days. 

She found herself seeking little ways in which he could help her as often as she could, just so he would be nearer to her or forced to interact with her. He was always so stoic otherwise. “Can you help me get this down, I can’t reach that high.” Was her favorite. Didn’t even matter what she was making him reach for. Watching his arms reach out above her head, his body so close behind her that her back nearly rested on his torso, never ceased to make her feel dizzy. 

_Let’s see. What do I know? He is always quick to help me when I’m in need. He gets annoyed when I chirp about incessantly. He never quite knows how to act with me when I’m upset. How can I use this knowledge?_ That was the million dollar question. 

\----------

Apart from her time thinking in the godswood, she decided to listen intently to the conversations around her. Particularly those of Lord Tywin. She knew he controlled Joffrey, Cersei, Tyrion, and everyone else in the keep for that matter. Something that awful Petyr had said to her seemed to stick in her mind: _“Always keep your foes confused.”_ So she played the stupid little girl with her head in the clouds, as she listened intently to the schemes of others. 

One day, Lord Tywin was commenting on Gregor Clegane. Even if she hadn’t been eavesdropping already, that name would have surely perked her ears up. He was speaking about how Gregor had killed another wife before she was able to bear children. Sansa couldn’t help herself, she spoke out of turn, though her words were carefully crafted. “It would be such a shame to not have any more loyal Clegane fighters, if neither brother were to ever produce heirs. Apologies, Lord Tywin, I shouldn’t have spoken out of turn.” And with that, she left the man and his council to return back to her chambers. 


	2. Let the Games Begin

_Time to set my grand plan in motion_ she thought as her handmaids helped her dress and style her hair for the day. As soon as they shuffled out, she flattened the non-existent wrinkles out of her dress and gathered the courage she would need to get through this day. 

After weeks of planning, she decided it was time to find out these feelings, once & for all. 

Sandor was waiting outside her door on this day, as he did most days. She caught a glimpse of him, to confirm, when the handmaids had left her room. 

_It’s now or never._

She took a deep breath and screamed. “Ahhh! Sandor! Help!” 

Just as planned, her door burst open immediately and Sandor rushed in, scanning the room with his sword drawn. Looking confused when he didn’t see an immediate threat in the room.

“Oh Sandor, put that thing away and help me! He’s disappeared and I must find him! I just must!” She frantically looked about the room – under the bed, behind the bathing tub, in her dressing tables. 

“What in the seven hells are you talking about, girl?” 

“Baby! He’s gone missing, I just don’t know what I’m going to do!” 

“Baby? Who in the seven hells is ‘Baby’?” He looked completely confused, and she had to do her best to stifle a giggle. 

“The cat, of course! Oh, it’s all ruined now. What will I do?” 

Sansa paused her flitting about the room and continued, “Well, you see, I just thought it would be sweet to give Tommen a cat for his nameday. But. Well. I left the box he was in open, and… well… I seem to have lost him. Won’t you please help me find him! His name is ‘Baby’.” 

“Baby! … Baby! … Don’t just stand there. Start looking! Baby!…” Though still confused and most assuredly angry, Sandor seemed to turn about the chamber looking for this unknown cat upon her insistence. 

She walked out onto the balcony, seemingly surveying the surroundings to see if the cat could have jumped from the balcony. 

“You don’t suppose he could have…” She motioned jumping over the balcony with her arm and saddened her features. “Oh dear. What will we do?” 

Seeing her distress, Sandor joined her on the balcony and surveyed the lands below. “Might be he went into the godswood below.” 

“Oh Sandor, how clever of you. I’m sure that must have been it. Come on, we’ll go at once!” Before he could protest, she grabbed his tunic by the sleeve and hurriedly ushered him out of the keep. 

Before passing the kitchens and running outside, he queried her “Little Bird. Now how do you plan to be able to catch this cat out there in the woods if you do find it?”

She stopped in contemplation all at once and he nearly collided into her. _That was close, I could have been squashed like a bug!_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the little bitty Baby chapter! (see what I did there?)  
> More to come! :)


	3. Into The Woods

They traveled cautiously into the godswood, eyes peeled for any movements that could indicate the cat. 

Sandor had insisted that they grab a fish from the kitchens in order to lure the cat. Though disgusting to hold the smelly thing, Sansa paraded about swinging the fish around her. “Babyyyyyy, oh babyyyyy! We’ve got a nice little treat for you!” she coo’ed and caw’ed into every tree and bush around her, to Sandor’s dismay.

“This is a fool’s errand. Let’s get back inside the keep. Forget about the stupid cat!” Sandor’s patience was already growing thin and they had just walked outside. 

“Sandor, don’t be silly. We can’t go back empty-handed and we just got out here. Can’t we please look around for a little bit? Just a little bit. Please?” She gave him a puppy-dog stare that made him immediately acquiesce and Sansa smirked and returned to her searching.

\---------

As they traipsed through the wood, Sansa looked down to see her dress turning to tatters at the bottom. _Oh well, I never liked this dress anyway._ She had worn one of the Lannister red dresses that Cersei had had made for her. 

She wasn’t used to walking through the brush, though she was enjoying this time with Sandor immensely. 

Lost in thought, she missed a branch sticking out that clasped itself to her dress. “Whaaaa….!” She yelped as she tripped and stumbled down a small hill. Sandor immediately ran after her. 

“Are you alright?” Sandor visually inspected her, searching for any sign of injury. 

Though fine, Sansa used this as a way to tease him, “You know, if you had cleared my way I wouldn’t have tripped!” She chirped at him. 

Sandor huffed, “Cleared your? You know, if you hadn’t let a cat get loose, we wouldn’t be out here at all!”

“Now Sandor, don’t be silly. That’s in the past.” With that, Sansa stood tall and continued her searching. Sandor trudging along behind her. 

\----------

They came upon a small creek and Sansa began to hop from side to side until the creek became too wide to do so. Every hop seemed to annoy Sandor further and she drew enjoyment from his annoyance. 

“Won’t you stop that.”

“Why? Am I doing something wrong?” Sansa looked over her shoulder and gave him the innocent reply. He slightly shook his head and muttered low enough under his breath that she couldn’t make out his words. 

Once the creek turned into a steady stream, Sansa plopped down on the side of the stream and began phase two of her plan. Crying. _He doesn’t know how to handle me when I’m upset._

Sansa had perfected being able to cry on command, having plenty of thoughts to draw tears from ever since her arrival in King’s Landing. 

“Oh dear. We’re never going to find Baby!” she blubbered “Tommen’s nameday is going to be ruined and it’s all my fault!” 

“It’s not your fault, little bird.” Sandor sat down next to Sansa, hesitantly. 

“But it is! It’s all my fault! Everything is my fault!” She threw her head into her lap and began to sob into the skirts of her dress. 

Sandor sat over her, unsure of what to do. He sheepishly put his hand on her shoulder and patted it twice. The movement was awkward, but Sansa bit back a small smile of achievement that he was touching her. 

“Joffrey will likely beat me for this now too!” She began to cry even harder into her skirts. 

Sandor lifted her head, and held her chin so that she was forced to look into his eyes. “I’ll not let him beat you again, little bird. I promise it.” 

She sniffled and nodded and began to gather herself, before slowly standing and patting her skirts. 

“That’s better. Now why don’t you go back to your chambers and I’ll find Baby for you.” Sandor said in a voice much sweeter than Sansa was used to hearing out of him. She liked it very much and she knew her plan was working. Though she wasn’t going to let him get rid of her that easily. 

“You mean, you want me to leave?” She said hesitantly, lips quivering as she spoke. 

“Yes” Was his quick reply.

“You mean you don’t want me to help you anymore?” Her eyes began to well-up again at this. 

“No.”

“After all the fun we’ve had? And after all the things I’ve done for you?”

“Well that’s what I mean…” Sandor confusedly began, but Sansa cut him off again. 

“Alright, I know enough to go when I’m not wanted.” She was full crying again at this point. She turned around and began to walk away, crying and blubbering out nonsense. 

“That’s not what I meant.” Sandor grabbed her by the shoulder, not ungently, and turned her back towards him. “You… You can come with me.” 

“Do you really mean it? Really, Sandor? You really want me here with you?”

“Yes.” He replied quickly and grabbed the stinking fish out of her hands to return to the search. 

“Baby! Where in the seven are you?” This time it was Sandor yelling out. Sansa smiled and rubbed the tears from her eyes. 

Everything was working out perfectly. 


	4. Can't Keep My Mouth Shut

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a small chapter, but I decided to break up what I had for the next chapter into two separate chapters, just to draw out suspense a little bit. :) 
> 
> Also, I don't know if these animals would be a thing in Westeros, but for the sake of this story please just assume that they are.

_Oh my gods. I can’t believe I’ve actually done it. There’s actually a cat out here._ Actually finding a cat wasn’t part of her plan, but since it worked out she decided she would have to improvise. 

“Oh look! Sandor, I’ve done it! I’ve found Baby! Bring the fish!” She said as she began to near the cat, making a clicking sound with her tongue and teeth & cooing “here kitty kitty, here kitty kitty” in her baby voice. 

“Good… Sansa? SANSAAAAA!!” She jumped slightly at his yelling, not knowing why he would scream at her like that while she was trying to coax the cat into coming towards her. “SANSA! Back away from that cat right now. Slowly.” 

“Oh Sandor, what is the matter? Can’t you see I’m in the middle of making friends with Baby here?” She argued softly as she pointed to the cat. 

“That’s not Baby. That’s no cat fit for keeping at all. That’s a bobcat, that thing’ll kill you as soon as you near it.” Sansa’s head shot up and she began to very slowly walk backwards, away from the cat. _oh no, I’ve done it now._

When she backed up into where he stood, he shoved her behind his back, not ungently. “Little bird, I want you to run. Run back into the Keep. I’ll take care of this animal.” Though his words were hushed, the implicit command was not unnoticed. 

She refused to leave him. She began to toss her head from side to side, still behind him, and he continued to motion for her to run. “I SAID GO!” 

The panic began to build up inside her, she refused to leave him alone with this wild animal – even though a part of her knew this animal didn’t stand a chance against the fearsome Hound. Still, she couldn’t let her entire plan go to waste, and more importantly she couldn’t leave him in possible danger. 

“No, no Sandor, I can’t leave you alone with that thing, I love you!” In the intensity of the moment, Sansa’s words came out without check. She immediately clasped her hand over her mouth, not believing that she actually voiced that out loud. 

“WHAT?!?” In complete shock, Sandor twirled around to face her so fast that Sansa almost lost her balance until he grabbed her waist to hold her steady.

At that same moment, the bobcat let out a deep, guttural roar and lunged forward. Sandor’s reaction time was so quick that his sword hit it’s torso right before it hit him and the cat was killed just inches from him, nearly sliced in two.

The whole thing happened so fast that it didn't seem real to Sansa, that is until she looked over at the dead animal on the ground and Sandor wiping the blood off his blade.

He looked like he was about to explode in anger. She knew he couldn't take any more of her games and at the latest events, she really didn't have it in her to continue on either. On top of that, she also couldn’t tell what his thoughts were of her admittance of her own feelings. He didn’t say anything to quell her thoughts.

For several long moments, he simply stared at her, with an unreadable expression on his face, before letting out a large breath he must have been holding for quite a time. “Are we done with this godsdamn cat chase now?” It wasn't an explosion, as she had been expecting, but the way he spoke it garnered no confusion that he was absolutely done with all of this.

Crestfallen, she simply nodded a yes and turned to head back into the keep. Her plan had failed and she was no closer to knowing the Hound’s true feelings for her than she was at the beginning of the day. Only now she had the embarrassment of having admitted her own – unrequited. 


	5. A Joyous Occasion

It was mid-afternoon when she returned to her chambers and she panicked as she began to change into an appropriate dress to face Joffrey and whatever mood he was in today. Her tardiness in court would definitely not go unnoticed. 

She entered through the side door to the great hall, with great effort not to make a sound with the click of her shoes on the concrete. Her efforts being for naught, Joffrey immediately took notice and screamed for her to appear before him at once. 

She glanced around the room as she walked forward slowly, noting that both Tywin and Tyrion were in attendance today. She knew Joffrey’s cruelty could only go so far in their presence. 

“And where has the traitor’s daughter been all day, when she should have been in court? And why in the seven do you smell like fish? How dare you come in here smelling so foul, the whole court can smell that disgusting odor!?” 

“I’m sorry your grace, you see, I had a horrid incidence with a cat.” 

“A WHAT?” 

“A cat. You see, I had a cat brought in. For Tommen’s nameday, as my gift to him. But I lost the cat, he got away from me, and jumped off the balcony from my chambers, and I thought I could find the cat, you know, if I had food and sang to it, that maybe it would come out of it’s hiding place and I could grab him. But, well, umm, I couldn’t find it.” She turned to where Tommen was standing, “I’m so sorry, Tommen, that I lost your nameday present.” Tommen smiled, obviously excited that Sansa had thought of doing such for him, and didn’t seem to care at all that the said cat was lost. 

“ENOUGH. That’s enough of your drabble, you stupid girl. Of course a stupid girl like you would waste all day running around chasing after a dumb cat. Get out of my face.” 

_Exasperation and courtesy. At least it works to quell Joffrey, even if it didn’t get Sandor to admit his feelings._

It was almost an hour later before a loud slamming of a door interrupted the entire hall and upon inspection, she found that it was Sandor stumbling into the room. Drunk. _How did he get so drunk so quickly? …and why is his hair wet?_

“DOG! What in the seven are you doing? Drunk? You’re supposed to be on duty right now!”

“Aye, your grace. Lost my time in the whorehouse. What can I say, the women refused to let me leave!” Sandor slurred and let out a horrific laugh as he spoke. The entire court gaped at his non-excuse, but Joffrey must have been glad for Sandor’s supposed “honesty”, because he nearly doubled over in laughter. 

Even though she knew it was a lie, that he had been with her all day, the thought of him in a whorehouse at all made her burn with jealousy. She took a deep breathe to ensure the emotion would not read on her face.

After catching his breath, Joffrey seemed to think on something for a moment. The entire court stood in silence, waiting to hear what Joffrey would do to his dog for this. 

“Sansa! Come here!” _no, no, no, he can’t know. How could he know?_ She gave him a confused look as she walked forward to join the Hound standing before the iron throne. 

Joffrey had a sinister smile on his face that made Sansa’s stomach turn in knots. 

“It seems that neither of you are able to attend court when your King demands it. Sansa, you are a traitor’s daughter – not fit for a Lord of high standing in my court. Dog, I’ve had enough of your absences and I’ve not forgotten about your own traitorous words during the Blackwater. I’ve come up with a fitting punishment for both of you! I hereby order that Sansa and my dog are to be married!” Sansa’s jaw dropped to the floor. Thank the gods everyone in the room took her shock for horror, as Joffrey’s grin widened. He was beyond pleased with this impromptu decision of his, thinking this would be a fate worse than death for both of them. 

”SMILE!” Joffrey exclaimed. “This is cause for celebration!”

Sansa nor Sandor could form words. They eyed each other briefly, before turning back to Joffrey and waiting to see if this was all a farce. 

Tywin moved forward, “That is enough court for one day. Clegane, you’ll join us in the small council room at once.” With that, the members of the small council, as well as Cersei, Joffrey, and Sandor stormed out of the hall and Sansa was left to stand alone and listen to the whisperings and giggles coming from all around her. 

_Please let this be true. I know the court thinks this is the worst match imaginable for me, but please let Joffrey not be swayed to change his mind._

She prayed to the Seven and to the old gods and fell to her knees in continued prayer as soon as she reached her chamber. 

_I don’t know if he loves me back, but I swear I will do everything I can to make him happy if we are joined._


	6. Insane She-Devil!

She didn’t know how long she had been asleep, but she woke up to the sound of hard knocking on her chamber door. She had fallen asleep on the floor, at the foot of her bed, where she was knelt in prayer. Lifting herself up and flattening her skirts, she made her way to the door to unbar it. 

Sandor stood in the door way tentatively, unsure if he would be allowed to enter. It looked as though he was frightened of her even though she had already admitted her feelings to him. _perhaps he didn’t believe me?_

She motioned for him to enter. He walked just far enough inside to close the door behind him, but no further. 

Hesitantly, he began “the King and Lord Tywin both agree that we are still betrothed to be married.” 

_Was he unhappy with this? Why does his face look so sullen?_

He took a small step forward and held out his arm as if he were reaching for her, though she stood still too far to reach. “Little bird, I know you don’t deserve to have to marry an ugly old dog like me. I’m sorry, I tried to talk them out of it.” 

She walked up to him and placed her hand on his arm, “Sandor, don’t…” but he interrupted her, intent on finishing relaying the rest of the news. 

“With my betrothal, I have been removed from the Kingsguard. I am to be awarded a Lordship, seems they want to ensure we produce more loyal Cleganes. My brother has killed every wife he’s had before a babe could be born.” He took a breath, but wasn’t finished with his speech so Sansa stood in front of him listening intently. 

“That’s not all. They want us to retake Winterfell from the Ironborn boy, and rule the North. Though, we would have to pledge fealty to the Iron Throne. …you would rule Winterfell against your brother.” Head bowed, Sandor couldn’t look at her when he relayed the last bit of information to her. 

She turned away from him at that. All she had wanted since being in King’s Landing and finding out the true nature of the Lannisters was to go home to Winterfell. There was a bitter taste in her mouth now at the thought that she was being offered everything she wanted, but in doing so would be put against her entire family. She turned and fell onto her bed, not able to control the sobs. 

Sandor sat on the bed near her, placing his hand on her shoulder, the only thing he knew to do to try to comfort her. 

“I’m sorry little bird. You don’t deserve this. You don’t deserve to be stuck with me, have your name tarnished by me.” 

Sansa shot up off the bed and slapped him in the face, on his good side, as hard as she could. She watched as his eyes went from soft gray to near black at the movement. 

“How could you!” She sneered at him. 

His anger abated, he still thought she was angry because she was betrothed to him. He lamented, “I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I should have never…” 

“Sandor Clegane! You think I’m upset because I’m betrothed to you? Really? After everything today, after what I told you with the bobcat, after I arranged for us to spend the entire day together, you think I’m upset by that?!” Her eyes, bloodshot from crying, now held a contempt that Sandor had never seen before. 

“But… Wait, what do you mean ‘arranged’ to spend the day together?” 

“THERE WAS NO CAT!” Her anger getting the best of her, she spewed it in his face. 

Silence grew between them for a time, the anger rising in each of them fueling the tension in the room. 

“What. Do. You. Mean. ‘there was no cat’?” 

“There was no cat! There was never a ‘Baby’. There, I said it! I never got a cat for Tommen’s nameday. I made up the whole thing to spend time with you, you giant fool!”

“You mean I spent all day on a wild goose chase for nothing?!” 

“YES!” 

He was so angry, he began rambling on, throwing his arms in the air throughout his speech to further show his rage, “Sansa Stark. YOU CRAZY BIRD! ARE YOU KIDDING ME? You insane she-devil! Love of my life! Royal pain in my arse. I SWEAR YOU’LL BE THE DEATH OF ME, WOMAN!” 

There was only one sentence her brain heard in his tyrade and it stopped her heart instantly, the anger leaving her. Soft-spoken, she replied, “What did you say?” She began to smile, which only seemed to infuriate him worse. 

“You’ll be the death of me, woman!” 

“No, before that.” She motioned for him to go back with her finger, smirk still plastered on her face. 

“Royal pain in my arse!”

“No, before that.”

“INSANE SHE-DEVIL!” as her smile increased, so did his anger. If she didn’t already know that he would never hurt her, she would be terrified of him right now. 

“The other one.” 

“CRAZY BIRD!”

“Other one.” 

The anger left his face, replaced by something else. Something cautious and hesitant. 

“ _loveofmylife_ ” He muttered it so quietly under his breath that if Sansa wasn’t already expecting it, she wouldn’t have known what it was. 

“What was that?” She still wanted him to say it out loud. Clearly. Her smile was so wide it reached her eyes as she waited for him to say those words again. 

Exasperated, he shouted this time “LOVE OF MY LIFE. DAMN YOU, WOMAN!”

Sansa flew into his arms and claimed his lips immediately. His hands grasped her tightly and returned the affections. She smiled against his lips and victoriously began to repeat, “I knew it. I knew it. Oh, Sandor! I knew it!” 

After several more minutes of exploring each other’s mouths feverishly, Sandor lifted his head away from hers. She gave a disapproving moan at the loss of contact and furrowed her brow at the confusion of why he did that. “What?” 

For several long seconds, he just looked into her eyes adoringly before answering her. 

“You smell like fish.” Was his reply as their faces parted from one another. Annoyed, Sansa swatted at him for ruining their beautiful moment. 

He let out a throaty chuckle and she couldn’t help but to smile at the genuine happiness in his eyes. 

“Well, you smell like an alehouse. How did you get so drunk so quickly before coming to court?” She asked, as she remembered her thoughts from earlier in the day. 

He chuckled again, “I wasn’t drunk, I just poured ale from the kitchens on me to make it convincing.”

“You lied? But you hate liars?”

“Aye. I do. But I hate the thought of harm coming to you because of me more.” 

She didn’t think her heart could swell any larger at that time, but it seemed to do so at his words. 

“So you’re not upset that you’re being forced to marry me?” he asked. _How can he still be so unsure of my affections?_

“Upset? That was the best news I’ve received since I arrived in King’s Landing!”

They continued to kiss each other, as he sat her gently on the bed. His hands began to explore her hair, her cheeks, her neck, everywhere he could touch – as if wishing to memorize every feature in case this moment was unreal. 

Sansa had the same thoughts and began to let her hands roam all over his body as well. When she laid her hand on the bad side of his face, he flinched instinctively, but she didn’t move her hand from the spot. Sandor moaned at this and deepened their kiss further. 

While she was still upset that the Lannisters wished to pit her against her own family for Winterfell, she was sublimely happy knowing she would have Sandor by her side through it all. She also knew that once she arrived back in the North and away from the scheming of King’s Landing, that all would right itself. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, that's all folks! Hope you liked it. 
> 
> If you haven't seen the movie "Bringing Up Baby", I highly recommend it. It's one of my favorite classic films. :)

**Author's Note:**

> This is going to be a light-hearted little fic. Likely about 5 chapters. I've got the whole thing pretty much complete, so will likely do an update or two a day until it's done. :) 
> 
> Merry Christmas!


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